I Hate Politics

I got this email from the Birchwood Team President, after today's ride.

Tom,
Frist let me say that I would rather have been able to have this conversation with you in person on the ride today. For a number of reasons, that didn't happen, but I don't want to ignore this opportunity to share my thoughts.In the two seasons you've been on the club, I've enjoyed countless conversations that I've had with you about our respective world views and have come to appreciate the insight and intelligence that you bring to those conversations. I come away from those chats certain that you are a level-headed and conscientious person and I appreciate your presence on the team.Given all of that, I have a hard time understanding who the Tom is that I sometimes see on some of our team rides, and today's is the recent example that spurs this message. I'm having a hard time squaring the thoughtful, community-oriented Tom in conversations with the "too important/busy/in-a-hurry to slow down for stop signs, wait for a red light to change, or wait for a teammate who dropped back as a result" person that can come out on rides. Now, I could certainly be way off in my interpretation, but as I repeatedly tell my students, we judge each other as much (usually more) on our actions as we do our words and I don't have an alternate interpretation to fit.I was not feeling spry enough to lead a ride today and was happy with someone taking over, but the tone changed the minute the whole group rolled through the first stop sign and it continued to plummet for me as the group rolled the next two and then couldn't wait five seconds for the light at Lake Street to change to green (it had clearly turned yellow when I pulled up to the intersection and I waited for the green). Had I been feeling better, I would have chased the group down and requested that we keep it a casual Sunday ride. I believed, however, that the group would notice that not everyone was together and wait up, giving me the chance to speak my peace when we regrouped.I can't tell you how disappointing it was to watch the group ride on ahead without a single person looking back. Although I don't and can't hold you personally responsible for the actions of others, I would like to suggest that the leader on the road of any ride sets the tone for how the whole group responds to the ride, each other, traffic, and traffic stops and that the tone could have been much different this morning than it was. (An analogy that comes from teaching is this: If I let my class start a day with a lot of freedom to act and behave in any way they choose, I have a much different class (more unruly, less focused) than if I expect them to model successful and respectful behavior. Some days, I'm more flexible, but when we need to have a focused day, I am much more conscious of how I hold them to positive expectations. Although my work life is with 10- & 11-year-olds, I know that adults are not drastically different when it comes to some of these basic behavior patterns.)By the time the group disappeared from my view going around the curves on Otis, I determined that I wanted none of the nonsense I had already seen and went off on my own in search of some quality riding and thinking time. Needless to say, the group ride today was not a good experience for me, and I shudder to think what someone who was checking out our club would have thought had they been invited along. Are we now no different the GP, or Flanders, or the fixie-riding maniacs who don't think rules and respect apply to them?My goal with Birchwood is to get the team to a better place than it has maybe ever been in terms of community, teamwork, respect for other cyclists, and respect for other users of the road. There's only so far that we can go, admittedly, but I don't see that as an excuse to not care about it and try to make it a better experience for more people. I would much rather count you as an ally in that effort because I know that people do rightfully listen to you and follow your lead, regardless of whether you want them to.I'm interested in your thoughts and would gladly spend time in a conversation like we've often had on the bike discussing this further.
Thanks for your time, Andy

This was my response.

Andy:
Had our conversation taken place on the bikes, it would have been a very short one.
I'm sorry that you had a disappointing ride today. I won't take any responsibility for that though. Mostly because I think we are responsible for our own happiness, but also because of the "thank yous" I got from the other 5 riders. I was also very pleased with the tone of today's ride, and had no desire to change it.
I too have been pleasantly surprised by the delightful conversations I've had with you on our group rides. I respect you as a person and as a cyclist. You have a great wealth of knowledge about cycling. Nevertheless, as is the case with all people, you and I have differences, some of which are quite dramatic.
I joined Birchwood for one reason, and that was to meet a particular woman. Along with her, I have made some friends, that I have gotten very close to. I have no desire to leave the team. I get friendship from the team, and I give that back. I also enjoy giving my style of riding to the team, and offer it just about every Saturday. I am very confident, that when anyone rides with me, they know exactly what to expect. I do blow stop signs, when I deem it safe, and red lights don't always change for cyclists. Everyone knows that I ride just a little faster than I advertise, and those who have put in a real hard effort have been surprised to find that I'll soft pedal, and I'll even fall back and bring them back up to the group. None of that's going to change, Andy. Even when I have a BW kit on, or when I have organized a ride with an invitation extended to any BW team member. I hope this makes your effort to reconcile who Tom is a little easier.

I remember a TCBC ride many years ago. It was the hill ride. It was towards the end, and we were coming up Ohio. There weren't a whole lot of us. I was leading the charge. Just before Annapolis, a guy in a Loon State jersey came around me and beat me to Annapolis. That is really rare. Even PM hasn't beat me up Ohio. I remember saying to the Loon, "good job, Andy! Way to go!" Andy, if you put your foot down at every one of those stop signs along Ohio, that was an even more incredible job than I had thought at the time, because I sure as hell hadn't.

Your friend,
Tom

42/15.2